Compassion Resurrected

“If we do our grieving deep and well, we become participants in a communal uprising, a resurrection in which the dead live on in the commitment of the survivors.” Parker J. Palmer

Without the thoroughness of loss we cannot experience the transition into resurrection. The log in the fire is transformed utterly into energy, heat and ash. Those who have died are energy if we gather around our loss of them and experience the fire of their lives. This pertains especially to the loss of those who have died through injustice. When we gather around their graves and mourn we are lifted up by their transcendent resurrection energy, our compassion grows and their hope becomes ours. The reverse is no doubt true when we avoid our grief and thus miss out on the resurrection fire. (Thoughts inspired by Parker J. Palmer & Latin American poem – ‘They have threatened us with resurrection’)

The truth is that our grieving with others attaches us with their cause, their lot, suffering and condition in a profound way. Teach me how to grieve God that compassion may flow abundantly.

"God-be-with-ye" the real Goodbye

No, I am not saying goodbye! But, I had never actually appreciated the meaning of the word. Joyce Rupp has opened my eyes to the depth of the Christian goodbye whether that be at the airport, bus stop, or pouring tears over a casket. When we say goodbye, the Christian is declaring that although we will miss those we love we acknowledge that God will be with them and they will have the loving presence of God to help them through loneliness. I think we also need to be saying a "God-be-with-me" as we also affirm that God remains with us who grieve the loss of those we love.

"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deut 31:8

Burning houses - a reflection on grief & loss – Mark Twain

Mark Twain wrote this when his daughter of 24 years died whilst he was away on a lecture circuit:
“A man’s house burns down. The smoking wreckage represents only a ruined home that was dear through years of use and pleasant associations. By and by, as the days and weeks go on, first he misses this, then that, then the other thing. And when he casts about for it he finds that it was in the house. Always it is an essential – there was but one of its kind. It cannot be replaced. It was in that house. It is irrevocably lost. He did not realize that it was an essential when he had it; he only discovers it now when he finds himself balked, hampered by its absence. It will be years before the tale of the lost essentials is complete, and not till then can he truly know the magnitude of the disaster.” Quoted in the book by Frederick Buechner, ‘Speak what we fell – not what we ought to say.’

I think it describes the process of grief very well, the length of the process, the sense of daily loss, and the unique ways in which we miss them at different times.

Tear duct communique

Tears are the gateway to our restored life. A matter of 'Befriending our tears' (Trevor Hudson, Touched by Resurrection Love). They are a sign of our surrender to another who can help us. Holding back our tears stops us from allowing others in. Jesus is standing in our midst saying ‘I am the Way, The Truth and The Life’ and we need to allow his Being to touch our being. Not just some teaching to muse over, some truth to ponder, some goal to work toward, but to experience his presence surround us, nurse us and listen to our most intimate of needs and longings.