Something for the Methodist control freak!

‘Life is not something to be solved, but a mystery to be lived’

This little truth helps the control freak within us to abdicate so that we can appreciate all of life and all its vicissitudes. We look weak when we are not in control. We are afraid of our reputations as leaders when we are not telling people what and how to do things. Fresh in a church I was in one of its first meetings and one elderly church stalwart said, “just tell us what to do and we will do it!” He had no idea of the group process of collective ingenuity or group spirit. The boss had to give the orders. Subsequently I felt like I was a bad leader. Who was this guy who would not give orders? Tight organization is a pet hate of mine. I am at my worst in meetings where the tables are placed in lines one after the other and a head table is up in the front. I know I am going to have a bad time when members of the meeting insist on changing every spelling error in the last minutes. I wonder if we Methodists need to live the mystery a little more (generalization sorry!) and put to death the organizational megalith that dictates our outcomes?

A real mystery

Well, say no more. It is my birthday. Forty years back on this day I was brought screaming into the world in the capital city of South Africa, Pretoria. It always amazes, the vicissitudes of ones life. What seems like a minor decision turns out to be the eventual succession of your life’s work and purpose. A decision I made in 1988 in a Air force barracks to serve God in mission, took one phone call and my life moved off in another direction, toward a social world of faith, church, mission, and ordination. It could have turned out so differently, but lets not go there. We don’t understand the greater picture, we get glimpses of it now and again, our world is wrapped up in the greater dream, the mystery we seek. I found myself criticizing a couple who drift from one church gathering to the next, they are always going up for prayer and accepting altar calls for this and that. They are searching for a touch of the almighty mystery that will transcend and satisfy but I am afraid they will keep searching for the taste of that they just cannot reach. But, why not, should we stop seeking the infinite and conclude our job is done, our lot is satisfied? The search needs redefinition.

Only God opens our eyes to the reality that is before us, that the reality is in fact the mystery. We are so used to the existence we breathe we call it normal, real, mundane and routine. But, look a little closer and you realize that this is the miracle, this is the life we so longed to find, it is the gift we have been waiting for all these years. It just took you a little longer to see it. The longer I walk this journey, the less I need to find other worldly abstractions. The more I embrace the silence, that is God, and my reality which is the mystery, my joy is complete and my heart is satisfied.